Romanticising Life

Warning: some sensitive subjects may be discussed

We tend to make life look a lot better than it actually is online. We tend to romanticize moving to places like New York very spontaneously. It may prove to be a blessing for some but sometimes things don’t work out the way they seem to in the video that you happened to see online. This can also have negative effects on us

What is romanticism? according to google- deal with or describe in an idealized or unrealistic fashion; make (something) seem better or more appealing than it really is.

I do not feel the need to elaborate more on that definition as it is pretty self-explanatory

I feel as we progressed, social media has changed drastically. We tend to make the worst of things look like it’s our calling. Personally, I’ve seen hundreds and hundreds of, “this is your sign to move to New York spontaneously with your best friends,” videos. I think we leave out the bad parts of our lives and show only the best ones where we are thriving which give people the complete opposite idea. It could be the simplest of things like you see a video of someone showing their camera roll in the past month and you see they have all artsy pictures and you compare it to your pictures and see you only have pictures of work done in school. It might be harmless but then again, I’m sure that person's month was not completely perfect. I think as we have grown and more and more content is being put out there our expectations have just increased because we have certain expectations about how one thing is supposed to be because that is what we are accustomed to seeing on television or any other social media app.

Romanticism is not entirely social media, it could be a book where you read in which the main character is failing at life but soon they fall in love and suddenly get their whole life together and the end is just more than perfect. We also have the romanticism of a utopia in movies. I really don’t think bursting out into song in the middle of class is acceptable in school and coordinating dance moves on the spot is quite difficult or even just the character having the best results possible after doing absolutely nothing to earn any of it.

Some adverse effects of romanticizing things:

- According to research, it prevents people from leading emotionally successful lives because they are always comparing themselves to what they see on the internet. It is quite rare to live an emotionally secure life but social media just takes things to another level. This is where the romanticism of the perfect life comes in, we all feel the need to live this perfect life where you have only good days and are super productive which is not really possible because we all have our bad days and it may also lead to burnout

- It sets unrealistic expectations which often lead to disappointment. You are so set on having your life a certain way after seeing a movie or reading a certain book that you get too caught up and then you sit back and realize that you can’t achieve the most perfect results without working for it. You get everything you deserve in the end

- It makes the wrong things seem right. For example, society makes young people think that having a certain body type is okay but if your another kind, it is not okay. People romanticize the “ideal body” which is not healthy and it making something seem okay but in reality, what does it matter how your body looks? As long as you’re happy, it really doesn’t matter?

The reality of life is pretty harsh. This might sound excessively negative but sometimes you don’t go to college where you want or get the job you want or end up with who you love or have the ideal life but living in the romanticized side of things is dangerous. You are living in your own world disconnected from reality but this is because we fear acceptance. We cannot accept the things we fear the most so we drive ourselves away from the acceptance of harsh reality. It’s okay to set goals for yourself and want certain things but don’t get too lost in it. Take that failure and use it as motivation to achieve your next success because often enjoyed the things we earned much more than the things that were presented to us on a silver platter.

Here are some quotes about romanticism in a negative and positive connotation:

1. You always romanticize the past as soon as the future begins to frighten you- Rick Remender

2. We romanticize the past with an illusion that we’d know how we’d fit - Robin Weigert

3. “Romanticising the past” is a familiar accusation, made mostly by people who think it is more grown-up to romanticize the future- Paul Kingsnorth

4. To romanticize the world is to make us aware of the magic, mystery, and wonder of the world; it is to educate the senses to see the ordinary as extraordinary, the familiar as strange, the mundane as sacred, the finite as infinite. — Novalis

5. There's a lot of talk about the positive aspects of love. We as a society downplay the danger, the anxiety, and the disappointment. We romanticize romance. — Helen Fisher

6. To be honest, I tend to romanticize the past, and though I appreciate all the conveniences of modern life, sometimes I yearn for simpler times. — Aziz Ansari

7. I think there are things that aren't represented in movies that are a big part of everyone's life. We romanticize everything about people in movies. One of the things I don't like in movies is that people feel alone with their bodily functions in the real world as if people in the movies don't do these things. — Charlie Kaufman

8. Big thoughts are fun to romanticize, but it's many small insights coming together that bring big ideas into the world. — Scott Berkun

After all this, I have concluded that- the grass is greener on the other side because it's fake. If someone’s grass is looking fresh and nice on the other side because it’s probably fake so stick to watering your grass and the path you are on right now, is fine. Reminder: social media is fake

Thanks for reading

Xx Mahika

(Ps: follow my Instagram: @blogbanterandbigwords where I share polls and put teasers for my upcoming blogs, you might also find some nice quotes in there)

(Also, it’s been one year since I started this blog so a special blog coming next week)